Why Are You So Sad?

The book explains how depression is a problem with the way you feel, and that mums and dads don’t feel bad on purpose (in exactly the same way as when someone gets a cold or flu). Depression can’t be caught or seen. It explains that depressed people sometimes don’t sleep well or eat properly, may forget things and have a lack of energy. They may shout and get cranky, cry or be sad. Some parents may put on a brave face and act happy, but still be unhappy inside. The book goes on to explain that there are things that can be done to help parents feel better, such as therapy or counselling. A doctor may prescribe medicine. When depression gets bad, the parent may need to stay in hospital. A few questions that children might ask are: who will take care of them, can they visit, when will they come home. There is a page in the book with drawings of faces of how a child may feel: angry, scared, sad, worried, etc. Children may be confused and worried that depression is somehow their fault. The book reassure the child that it is not caused by anything they have done, and they are still loved by their depressed parent (even if they have trouble showing it). It also emphasises that a child still loves the parent even if they feel angry. A child can’t fix depression, and it’s not their job to do so. They are also not alone, and there are lots of adults around to talk to ask for help from. The book recommends that the child talks things through with friends or a responsible adult. It also includes advice on how to manage feelings of anger.